Wallowing

With all the snow, and just plain nasty weather I've found myself wallowing. Well at least I'll blame it on the weather. I'm angry at myself for letting me play pity party for poor me. How selfish and downright silly. I have so much to be thankful for , to look forward to, and be excited about. Something though has gotten a choke hold on my mind and I've been wallowing in self pity, self doubt and self absorption. I wish the grass didn't always look so much greener on the other side. From experience , I've crossed the fence to the other side and only found briar's . I can get so caught up in the "now" and instant gratification that its like putting blinders on a horse. Interestingly enough as I walked into work today the first song on the sound system was a Garth Brooks song, Unanswered Prayers. Hmm... how fitting for me and my mood this last month. I'm so easy to say I want, I want , I want without saying what can I give , what can I do to help? I'm not normally this self involved , so this whole mood change has really thrown me, I almost blamed it on menopause...but realistically its just me wallowing in my own mud. I don't know how much longer I'm going to be in the mud.. seems like the harder I work towards getting out , the deeper it drags me in. I'm hoping for a beautiful sunny day that will help me get up and out of the drudge , after all I really have other things to do but whine.